Ever since the poly group folded, I have pushed my posts into areas that I much rather would have posted after rigorous discussion but them’s the breaks in a country that is largely sexually conservative and which is still I contend, uncomfortable talking about sex in a mature manner.
Anyway, found this via @ChrisRyanPhD: Sex worker’s view of marriage.
Greatest respect for this man and his thought process. Sex At Dawn by Cacilda & Chris is a great read. Highly recommended.
I agree mostly with the article and I genuinely wonder what is the true percentage of marriages that wallow in this state?
Surely one can present the evidence that is the above, in that prostitution is still very profitable and secondly, one should look at the gender ratios (and profit margins) of dating sites which are strongly populated with men vice women.
Additionally I have said a few times now I strongly feel that marriage has its place for some, but certainly not all.
Furthermore I strongly believe it is high time we all took our collective heads out of the sand and acknowledged the truths that so many are so willing to discuss.
1. That it is an archaic and unnecessary human requirement in a world that has moved on from the original intent of marriage in most parts of the world.
2. That humans need companionship mostly and this can be met via friendships rather than marriage.
3. And if we are ever to see some genuine sexual balance between genders in this world, – which is this articles root cause I would contend, we need less marriages and more friendships with benefits and/or polyamorous arrangements for those with enough sense & compassion to negotiate poly.
Anyway, please have a read of the article and if you are game, post a comment.
Love this song…
Found this on Fetlife as written by Raine.
A great read and comes highly recommended by moi.
Love hard peeps,
Personally, I am a fan because as I have come to learn, marriage has quite the long and interesting history.
Couple that with the fact that it is a beautiful word in its own right IMHO.
What I am not a fan of is the version perpetuated by some in society, the church and certain governments as witnessed personally in Australia over the past 30 odd years.
So many factors are a part of a great marriage and I contend that not enough is being done to keep marriage great. One only has to look at facts ie: divorce rates, a high domestic violence rate, single parenthood as a societal norm, affairs abounding etc etc.
Both sexes have to change but there is a lot of resistance with both blaming each other for what they consider “the reasons” for divorce and other issues that affect marital unions.
I personally would like to see marriage remain the “top dog”, but for that too happen so many things need to change in my opinion. Things are changing slowly but I doubt enough will be done to keep it as such.
Until such time communication in relationships becomes the defacto standard taught as part of a country wide sex-ed/relationship course for year 10, 11 and 12’s the stand-in formula in a mix of love and lust in spontaneous quantities dependant on the individual personalities will rule and thus divorces, affairs and single parenthood will continue to be commonplace.
Polyamory can fit in as it does currently for those relationships that get the basics right with it and other forms if union being covered in the last year of the course.
With the seed sown then people can do as they choose or are most comfortable with.
But to finish on a high note one thing that is coming despite ongoing resistance from conservatives in ever smaller numbers is same – sex marriage, totally legal and an equal of its heterosexual counterpart.
This is a very interesting topic that I have barely touched on so do come down to one of our meets if you would like to chat.
I’m attending a Meetup with Peninsula Polyamory and Open Relationships Meetup http://meetu.ps/2CmmTj
Until then, love many,