Love Times Infinity blog – highly recommended.

http://lovetimesinfinity.wordpress.com/

Have loved reading this woman’s insights into sex, love and relationships over the past few years.

She has a great writing style that breaks down the issue into bitesized chunks that seem easy to process, at least to this brain anyway.

Please do have a read.  Some genuinely fascinating topics are contained within.

Love many,

Shane

Up For Polyamory?

@TheAtlantic: Up for polyamory? Creating alternatives to marriage http://t.co/7JUo2KsHV7

This is another thought provoking read. A lot of interesting threads covered here and I look forward to discussing one or many over a drink at Vesbar as per the link below.

I’m attending a Meetup with Peninsula Polyamory and Open Relationships Meetup http://meetu.ps/2CmmTj

Until then, love many,

Shane

Thoughts on marriage…

Personally, I am a fan because as I have come to learn, marriage has quite the long and interesting history.
Couple that with the fact that it is a beautiful word in its own right IMHO. 

What I am not a fan of is the version perpetuated by some in society, the church and certain governments as witnessed personally in Australia over the past 30 odd years.

So many factors are a part of a great marriage and I contend that not enough is being done to keep marriage great. One only has to look at facts ie: divorce rates, a high domestic violence rate, single parenthood as a societal norm, affairs abounding etc etc.

Both sexes have to change but there is a lot of resistance with both blaming each other for what they consider “the reasons” for divorce and other issues that affect marital unions.

I personally would like to see marriage remain the “top dog”, but for that too happen so many things need to change in my opinion. Things are changing slowly but I doubt enough will be done to keep it as such.

Until such time communication in relationships becomes the defacto standard taught as part of a country wide sex-ed/relationship course for year 10, 11 and 12’s the stand-in formula in a mix of love and lust in spontaneous quantities dependant on the individual personalities will rule and thus divorces, affairs and single parenthood will continue to be commonplace.

Polyamory can fit in as it does currently for those relationships that get the basics right with it and other forms if union being covered in the last year of the course.
With the seed sown then people can do as they choose or are most comfortable with.

But to finish on a high note one thing that is coming despite ongoing resistance from conservatives in ever smaller numbers is same – sex marriage, totally legal and an equal of its heterosexual counterpart.

This is a very interesting topic that I have barely touched on so do come down to one of our meets if you would like to chat.

I’m attending a Meetup with Peninsula Polyamory and Open Relationships Meetup http://meetu.ps/2CmmTj

Until then, love many,

Shane

A quote from Ethical Slut

I love this book.  Here’s a taste…

“To us, a slut is a person of any gender who celebrates sexuality according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you.” 
“Sluts may choose to have solo sex or to get cozy with the Fifth Fleet. They may be heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, or radical activists or peaceful suburbanites.”
“As proud sluts, we believe that sex and sexual love are fundamental forces for good activities with the potential to strengthen intimate bonds, enhance lives, open spiritual awareness, even change the world. Furthermore, we believe that every consensual sexual relationship has these potentials and that any erotic pathway consciously chosen and mindfully followed, can be a positive, creative force in the lives of individuals and their communities.”

“Sluts share their sexuality the way philanthropists share their money: because they have a lot of it to share, because it makes them happy to share it, because sharing makes the world a better place.”

“Sluts often find that the more love and sex they give away, the more they have: a loaves-and-fishes miracle in which greed and generosity go hand in hand to provide more for everybody. Imagine living in sexual abundance.”

exerpt from:
The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton, Janet. W. Hardy.

http://www.kobobooks.com/ebook/Ethical-Slut/book-pIRvnZ2IB0CCyXchaq3aow/page1.html

Build it and they will come.

That line from “Field Of Dreams” has always stuck with me.

And that’s how with the help of members and their totally excellent suggestions we might actually get around to eventually growing a little poly community amongst the masses.

Who knows what is going to happen next because as the group’s second actual physical member in Suzie has just elaborated…The journey is the destination…and live it while you have it.  (Sorry Suz’e, couldn’t remember your exact words :-))

The only ground rule I want to set and trust me, I lament having to use the word rule is that we all listen and allow others to speak an offer up their experiences.

What this group isn’t going to be if I may be so bold is a “fuck-club”.  I hope it will be more about the minds of members because if we can get those minds into gear the loins will surely follow in a beautiful fluid example of natural sexuality at its best.

Anyway…glad this one is out of the way. 
Onwards now to neuron growing territory and Ffffuuuuunnnnnn!

Love many,

Shane

Poly comes to town, Vesbar, Somerville.

Van Morrison playing Moondance, chilling enjoying an Erdinger contemplating how to build this thing.

Firstly, politically the Peninsula is blue in that the Liberal party have held sway for some time both locally and federally.

Why does this matter in the context of polyamory you may be asking?

Well, in my experience that equates to conservative values of marriage, fidelity, commitment in the standard narrative and intimacy within prescribed societal boundaries.

Poly doesn’t have any boundaries.  Nor does it seek to control you or how or whom you choose to spend time with.

Thus, I think it’s fair to say that growing this group is going to be an interesting challenge.

Having said all that, the group now has 7 members whom I hope in the fullness of time to engage in conversation, listening to what interests them and more importantly what motivated them to join the Peninsula Poly Meetup?

Love many,

Shane

The journey begins…

Hi.

The day I opened The Ethical Slut and started reading things just started making sense.  Up until that point I had never heard of Polyamory with the closest I had come to the word being that show on SBS  called Big Love about a Polygamy family.  Not exactly my thing but certainly an interesting alternative lifestyle that obviously works for some just like Polyamory works for me.

Thanks to Gill S for mentioning this book 4 years ago.  She started me on this journey and I will always be thankful for that recommendation.

Since then I have taken baby steps trying to find like minded people who were free of mind enough to open their blinkers in regards to sexuality, intimacy and relationships not unlike one does when one travels.  It hasn’t been easy but life wasn’t meant to be easy as most know.

Thanks also to Susan who put me onto Meetup which has helped me realise a dream in being able to spread the word about Polyamory in this ever-changing world in which we live.

Because if one thing is for certain, marriage and “the standard narrative” as we were all well and truly institutionalised on is not the end game for everyone.

That is why I urge you to pick up this book.  At the very least it will make you think and question what you may consider to  be the only path.  Did just that for me and I am never looking back.

Anyway, that’s enough as an opening post.  Stay tuned for further posts and all sorts of link goodness as time goes by.

Love many,

Shane